We had booked this tour which started in New York and went to Buffalo, Niagra Falls (both the US and Canadian sides), Toronto, Ottawa, Montreal, Quebec City and ending in Boston about a month previously because it was 3 tickets for the price of 2 and you got to stay in a Hilton. Later we were informed by "TOURS 4 FUN" (yes it's actually called that) that the tour guide had to speak in both English and Chinese because of the large Asian interest. What we had not anticipated was that we would not only be the only ones other than one parent-aged couple from Adelaide who spoke English as a first language, but also that were not excited by many of the mundane sights of North America. As discovered in our first stop: the Corning Glass Museum.
So we had crazy times there for an hour or so, watching glass things get made by a very butch lady in dungarees and sitting in the cafe drinking coffee and complaining. This would become a common procedure throughout the week.
Having watched 'Coach Trip' religiously as wasteofspace humanities students back in Manchester, we had high expectations for our Brendan equivalent. For those reading who have better things to do than watch sub-par daytime TV, Brendan is the jolly and very camp tour guide of a coach in which couples get to go to various European countries, do activities, develop a slow and steady hatred for each other and vote each other off the show every week before determining a winner. Amy, Emily and I needless to say envisioned ourselves as those two boys on it when last we watched who everyone loved because they were young and cheeky and lovable, much like ourselves. Emily had actually met the two boys (i forget their names) once in Bristol so it was naturally assumed this was a done deal.
We slotted into this role with moderate success, making friends with numerous Asian clans including two Filipino couples whom we came to know and love as Mum 1, Dad 1, and Mum 2 and Dad 2. Mums 1 and 2 were sassy midwives in California who had worked and played together for 30 years, Dad 1 was a golf enthusiast and Dad 2 enjoyed our company because we would always laugh at his crap jokes and swoon over pictures of his grandson. The Brendan of the group was, to our surprise, not a bumbling overweight man with a friendly northern accent but in fact a young Chinese fellow named Frank who wore the same outfit for 3 days straight and didn't warm to us because we thought his activities were rubbish and were arguably more popular amongst the group than him. It was in fact his own fault for scheduling 3 separate boat trips on various lakes and rivers at $30 a pop into one week in which it rained the entire time. Stupid Frank.
Having watched 'Coach Trip' religiously as wasteofspace humanities students back in Manchester, we had high expectations for our Brendan equivalent. For those reading who have better things to do than watch sub-par daytime TV, Brendan is the jolly and very camp tour guide of a coach in which couples get to go to various European countries, do activities, develop a slow and steady hatred for each other and vote each other off the show every week before determining a winner. Amy, Emily and I needless to say envisioned ourselves as those two boys on it when last we watched who everyone loved because they were young and cheeky and lovable, much like ourselves. Emily had actually met the two boys (i forget their names) once in Bristol so it was naturally assumed this was a done deal.
We slotted into this role with moderate success, making friends with numerous Asian clans including two Filipino couples whom we came to know and love as Mum 1, Dad 1, and Mum 2 and Dad 2. Mums 1 and 2 were sassy midwives in California who had worked and played together for 30 years, Dad 1 was a golf enthusiast and Dad 2 enjoyed our company because we would always laugh at his crap jokes and swoon over pictures of his grandson. The Brendan of the group was, to our surprise, not a bumbling overweight man with a friendly northern accent but in fact a young Chinese fellow named Frank who wore the same outfit for 3 days straight and didn't warm to us because we thought his activities were rubbish and were arguably more popular amongst the group than him. It was in fact his own fault for scheduling 3 separate boat trips on various lakes and rivers at $30 a pop into one week in which it rained the entire time. Stupid Frank.
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| Emily, Amy and I with Yuli and Agnes - AKA Mums 1 and 2 |
Anyway, we were off to a great start with the glass museum. Exactly what we had come to America to see. Next stop - Niagra Falls!
Listening to: "Collie Man" by Slightly Stoopid
Groove along here.
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